Joy

Great Attitude Series: “Joy”

Every day you can find at least one thing to laugh about!

Someone asked Mother Teresa once what the job description was for anyone wanting to work alongside her in the grimy streets and narrow alley ways of Calcutta. Without hesitation her response was two things. First of all you need a strong work ethic and a joyful attitude. She stated that it had been her observation that both of these are missing in people today

Think for just a moment about Proverbs 15;15; “A cheerful heart has a continual feast.” I heard a great response to the question, “How are you today?” The response; “Everyday is a holiday and every meal is a banquet.” Now that is a great attitude on life. I find it interesting that this verse follows instructions on heeding instruction and seeking knowledge in the right places. Therefore, it produces a cheerful heart

·         The ability to get a laugh out of everyday situations is our safety valve. It rids us of tensions and worries that could otherwise damage our health.

·         To show this is no exaggeration listen to Proverbs 17:22; “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones.”

Did you know that the term “joy (xara) occurs 123x within 61 verses of scripture of the New Testament? Do you think that God desires for His people to be happy? For His church to experience joy? The inward attitude of joy governs the outward display of the heart.

Let us consider how the Apostle Paul uses this term – JOY

1.    First of all joy is bound up in the work as an Apostle. It is “joy in the faith…” (Phil. 1:25) and it is a fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22).

2.    Consider a paradoxical verse “For the Kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking. But of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.” Romans 14:17. This is paradoxical in the sense that the Kingdom of God is now and future. Therefore, joy is a component of the now and then.

3.    Joy is a derivative of proclaiming Christ – Philippians 1:18

4.    “Holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain” (Phil. 2:16). Joy in this verse is more than an emotion. It is a reference to the future experienced as joy in the present.

5.    Joy is maintained in the face of suffering – 2 Cor. 7:4; “I am acting with great boldness toward you; I have great pride in you, I am filled with comfort. In all of our affliction, I am overflowing with joy.”

a.    Consider the motif of joy in suffering: Colossians 1:24; 2:5; 2 Timothy 1:4

Confidence

Great Attitude Series: “Confidence”

“God has not only created each of us as distinct individuals, He also uses us in significant ways.” (Swindoll)

There is a common dichotomy (tension) in life. Those who don’t have vision or determination, and refuse to dream the impossible are always in the majority. Therefore, they will always take the vote. They will always outshout and outnumber those who walk by faith and not by sight, those seeking the kingdom of God and His righteousness. Those who choose to live by sight will always outnumber those who live by faith. To walk by faith requires courage. It requires the audacity to stand-alone and challenge the majority to trust God.

It has been said that Walt Disney would not attempt anything new unless there was a unanimous disagreement. Otherwise Disney did not feel it was worth his time to create and dream what everyone else could easily grasp.

Selected Scriptures

Psalm 90:2, “…from everlasting to everlasting You are God.” From my yesterday to my tomorrow – GOD! Listen to Charles Suprgeon on this verse: Before the mountains were brought forth. Before those elder giants had struggled forth from nature’s womb, as her dread firstborn, the Lord was glorious and self-sufficient. Mountains to him, though hoar with the snows of ages, are but newborn babes, young things whose birth was but yesterday, mere novelties of an hour. Or ever thou hadst formed the earth and the world. Here too the allusion is to a birth. Earth was born but the other day, and her solid land was delivered from the flood but a short while ago. Even from everlasting to everlasting, thou art God, or, “thou art, O God.” God was, when nothing else was. He was God when the earth was not a world but a chaos, when mountains were not upheaved, and the generation of the heavens and the earth had not commenced. In this Eternal One there is a safe abode for the successive generations of men. If God himself were of yesterday, he would not be a suitable refuge for mortal men; if he could change and cease to be God he would be but an uncertain dwelling place for his people. The eternal existence of God is here mentioned to set forth, by contrast, the brevity of human life.

Philippians 1:6, “I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.” How do we live with worry, stress and fear? Let’s get practical: “God you are at work, you are in control. Lord God you know what is happening. You are there at the beginning, and you will bring everything that occurs to a conclusion that results in your glory.” Remind yourself of this often throughout the day and then RELAX! From this point forward it really does not matter what happens does it? It is in God’s hands.

The Life Application Study Bible notes on v.6 says this; “The God who began a good work within us continues it throughout our lifetime and will finish it when we meet him face to face. God’s work for us began when Christ died on the cross in our place. His work within us began when we first believed. Now the Holy Spirit lives in us, enabling us to be more like Christ every day. Paul is describing the process of Christian growth and maturity that began when we accepted Jesus and continues until Christ returns.”

CONCLUSION

When Christ becomes our focus, our reason for existence, confidence replaces our anxiety, fears and insecurities. This fact will help us overcome common joy stealers in life.

1. Christ broadens our circumstances to see the bigger picture. Limitations can become a challenge rather than a chore.
2. Christ delivers us from the preoccupation of others. Other people’s opinions, motives, and criticisms no longer seem important.
3. Christ calms our fears about our future and ourselves. This gives us daily hope!

Great Attitudes: EXCELLENCE

If we are going to engage “excellence” it will require 100% effort 100% of the time. Natalie Gabal helps bring about an awareness of what happens when 99.9% is the standard. Consider this year that:

• 2,000,000 documents would be lost by the IRS
• 12 babies would be given to the wrong parents each day
• 291 pacemaker operations would be performed incorrectly
• 20,000 incorrect drug prescriptions would be written
• 114,500 mismatched pairs of shoes would be shipped

Excellence starts in the MIND. It has to do with the way that we think about God, ourselves and others. From this it grows into the way we think about business, marriage, and family. The second step has to do with our WILL. Disciplining the eyes, the hands, the feet, keeping moral tabs on ourselves and refusing to let down our guard are qualities of excellence. People of excellence know how to turn right thinking into action even when the emotions don’t agree.

Philippians 4:8

“Finally; brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”

Fix your attention of these six specifics

1. Not unreal far-fetched dreams, but things that are true, real, valid.
2. Not cheap, flippant, superficial stuff, but things that are honorable and worthy of respect.
3. Not things that are wrong and unjust, critical and negative, but that which is right.
4. Not things that are carnal, smutty and obscene, but things which is pure and wholesome.
5. Not things that prompt arguments and defense in others, but those things that are lovely, agreeable, attractive, winsome.
6. Not slander, gossip and put-downs, but information of good report, the kind that builds up and causes grace to flow.

It should be of no great surprise that we act out precisely what we take in. In other words we “become what we think.” Proverbs 23:7 states, “For as he thinks within himself, so he is.” The secret of living out an excellent life is merely a matter of thinking thoughts of excellence. It is a matter of programming our minds with the kind of information that will set us free.

Three Questions

1. As you think through the major decisions of the past six to eight months, have you pleased the Lord or have you fed your ego?
2. Have you begun to take your personal goals and desires before the Lord for His final approval?
3. Are you willing to change those goals if, while praying about them, the Lord should lead you to do so?

GREAT ATTITUDES!

“Optimism”

An Optimistic Outlook

In order for old defeating thoughts to be invaded, conquered, and replaced by new victorious ones, we need to go through a process of reconstruction. In order for this to happen we need to go through a mental cleansing. The best way for this to happen is to memorize scripture. If we are going to aggressively come against demoralizing thoughts we need biblical ammunition.

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13

“Those who wait for the Lord will gain strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary.: Isaiah 40:31

“Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you; surely I will help you…” Isaiah 4:10

“These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

A Positive Perspective

• One of the greatest benefits to be gleaned from the Bible is perspective. We can get discouraged when we temporarily lose our perspective. Little things become mammoth – motivation can become drained and worse of all we lose hope.
• God’s Word is tailor-made for gray-slushy days. It is like a beam of light penetrating the fog of circumstance. This big-picture perspective gives us hope.
• People who inspire others are those who see invisible bridges at the end of dead-end streets.
• “Whatever was written…was written for our instruction, that through…the encouragement of scriptures we might have hope.” Romans 15:4

A Can-Do Attitude

• According to the theory of aerodynamics, repeatedly demonstrated in wind tunnel testing, the bumblebee is unable to fly. This is because the size, weight, and shape of the body in relation to the total wingspread make flying impossible. The bumblebee obviously did not read this report.
• Caleb had a “can-do” attitude. When you study his life in the book of Joshua, you will find that he was positive even when others around him were negative.
• They said, “We can’t,” He said, “We can.”
• They said, “We shouldn’t.” He said, “We must.”
• They said, “It’s impossible.” He said, “There is no such word with God.”
• Refuse to let your situation determine your attitude!

Ten Characteristics of a healthy Church

Ten Characteristics of a Healthy Church

By: Stephen A. Macchia

(Quoted from his book: “Becoming A Healthy Church Workbook”)

1. God’s empowering presence – Actively seeking the Holy Spirit’s presence
2. God exalting worship – Worship that engages the heart, mind, soul, and strength of the people
3. Spiritual disciplines – provides training and resources for people’s spiritual growth and development
4. Learning and growing in community – making available the opportunity to grow together in a safe and mutual affirming environment
5. A commitment to loving and caring relationships – Being intentional in our care and love for one another
6. Servant-leadership development – giving other leaders opportunities for becoming servant leaders
7. Outward focused -  reaching our community
8. Wise administration and accountability
9. Networking with the body of Christ
10. Stewardship and generosity – teaches people to be good stewards over their resources and challenges faithful giving.

20 Habits That Stop Growth

Twenty Habits That Stop Growth[1] 

1.      Winning too Much – The need to win at all costs and in all situations

2.      Adding too Much Value – You have to add your two-cents into every discussion

3.      Passing Judgment – Rating others while imposing your standards on everyone around you.

4.      Making Destructive Comments – Needless sarcasm and cutting comments that make yourself appear sharp and witty

5.      Starting with “No,” “But,” or “However” – The overuse of these qualifiers communicate “I’m right and you’re wrong.”

6.      Telling The World How Smart We Are – The need to show that you are actually smarter than you really are.

7.      Speaking When Angry – Anger is not an appropriate management tool.

8.      “Let Me Explain What That Will Not Work” – Sharing even when you were not asked.

9.      Withholding Information – Attempting to hold information to your personal advantage.

10.  Failing to Give Proper Recognition – Not being able to praise others in their success.

11.  Claiming Credit That We Don’t Deserve – Overestimating one’s contribution to any task.

12.  Making Excuses – Repositioning annoying behavior as a permanent fixture.

13.  Clinging to The Past – Deflecting blame onto circumstances of yesterday.

14.  Playing Favorites – Not being aware of unfairly treating others.

15.  Refusing to Express Regret – Not being able to take responsibilities for one’s actions.

16.  Not Listening – Passive-aggressive form of disrespecting others.

17.  Failing to Express Gratitude – The most basic form of bad manners.

18.  Punishing the Messenger – A misguided need to attack the very people who are attempting to help.

19.  Passing The Buck – Blame everyone but yourself.

20.  An Excessive Need to Be “Me” – Exalting our faults as virtues simply because that is who I am.

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[1] Marshall Goldsmith. What Got You Here Won’t Get You There (New York: Hyperion, 2007), 40-41.

Maintaining Healthy Boundaries

Maintaining Healthy Boundaries

                Pastors are being called upon to deal with some complex issues which in many cases they have not been prepared to address.  In addition, what I have found is that people often assume a ministerial vocation is the only vocation that makes a person an expert in all subject areas—NOT!  But unfortunately, too often the minister and congregation will assume that because a spiritual leader is placed in such a high esteem that he is likely an expert in all areas.  It is a setup for a lot of emotional pain for the minister and his parishioner. 

Take a moment to reflect….
                       What are boundaries?
                       Describe you boundaries.
                       What are areas screaming for boundaries in your life?

Boundaries are property lines that assist us with knowing where we begin and end.  Pastors need to develop boundaries in areas such as conversations (do not dominate discussions with your knowledge), voice levels (other may not want to hear you during their meal or in the elevator of the hospital or public place), length of sermon, pastoral counseling, schedules, salaries, their staff and congregation.  Everyone needs a personal boundary system or interior mechanism that protects your body, mind, emotions, and behavior.  The boundary system has three purposes:  gives you a sense of self, prevents you from being victimized, and prevents you from being an abuser.

Boundaries are property lines that we need in order to stay healthy and balanced in our everyday lives.  Otherwise, we could easily be caught up in others’ needs and avoid taking care of ourselves and become compassion fatigued.

Boundaries can be defined as exterior and interior.  Exterior boundaries are symbolic of fences.  Visualize a high, chain-link fence with rolling barbed wire and enough electric current running through it to slightly sting anyone who touches it.  This kind of fence allows someone to see the other person’s “property,” while its barbed wire and respectable voltage keeps them from trespassing.  Conversely, this kind of fence will keep others from trespassing onto your own “property.”  Normally when we are in everybody else’s stuff, we are not taking care of what God has entrusted us to look after.

Interior boundaries, on the other hand, need to be made out of reinforced steel and concrete that forms a dam, with a red button and a green button at your fingertips.  We need to visualize the red button and how it needs to be pushed in order for the dam to stop incoming flow from flooding our thoughts, our emotions and our behaviors.  Dam, dam and dam (and we are not even cursing!)

Note that God has made us free moral agents and that we have a choice to establish these boundaries.  When we do not establish boundaries, we find ourselves feeling as though we have no choice, and we get caught up in an unstable cycle.  It’s then that we’re in trouble.  We have allowed the adversary of our soul to put us in a very unhealthy condition.  Boundaries help us to stay out of role-playing and game-playing.  Boundaries help us say, “No, I’m not playing!”  They allow us quiet time for prayer and meditation to know, to hear the still small voice for adult daily living.

-Kenneth A. Finch, Ph.D. LMHC is currently in private practice as a Board Certified    Traumatologist, Board Certified Cognitive Behavior Therapist and Board Diplomat Clinical Sexologist.  He is the author of Umbrella of Grace: Spiritual Abuse, Addiction and Recovery.  Dr.  Finch conducts leadership, marriage and family conferences

The Chrysalis Factor

Before it becomes a butterfly, a caterpillar goes through a growth stage called a "chrysalis." On the surface it may not look like much is happening, but the delicate chrysalis process changes the fuzzy caterpillar into an awesome butterfly with wings of intricate designs and intense colors. The chrysalis process symbolizes how Christ can transform you and your church into something beyond your dreams. It happens when you grow beyond yourself, opening your life to Jesus' power and love.

When this principle of nature is applied to leadership and church growth there are some insights to understand what the “chrysalis factor” is not. There are seven insights:

1. It is not about a Charismatic Leader
2. It is not about latching onto “hot trends” in the religious world
3. It is not about having a clear articulated vision statement
4. It is not about geographical location
5. It is not denominational identity
6. It is not strategic planning
7. It is not solely (though important) about doctrinal conservatism

So what is the “Chrysalis Factor” as applied to religious leadership and churches? Consider the following table:

Level of Leadership	Description	% of Senior Pastors Who Have Attained This Level
Acts 1: The Called Leader	The early church leaders were called to be witnesses of and for Christ (v.8). The “Chrysalis Factor” cannot occur by leaders who are not definitely called by God	98%
Acts 2: The Contributing Leader	Most of Acts 2 is devoted to Peter’s sermon. We see him fulfilling the basic essentials of leadership: Preaching/Teaching/Prayer. Only 4% of churches in America Meet these criteria.	22%
Acts 3: Outward Focused Leaders	These leaders constant move the church to look beyond itself	14%
Acts 4: Passionate Leadership	Passion is not a personality trait. You will recognize it: “…they began to recognize them as having been with Jesus” Acts 4:13	6%
Acts 5: Bold Leadership	These leaders are willing to take steps of faith, to make tough calls that few other leaders are willing to make – Acts 5:1-11	3%
Acts 6/7: The Legacy Leader	These leaders quickly give the ministry to others and let them receive the credit for their work Acts 6:1-7	Less than 1%

There are a few penetrating questions to consider:

• In what ways are you being developed as a person?
• What are you presently doing that develops leaders around you?
• Do you have a fair grasp of how fearfully and wonderfully you have been made?

How are you releasing other into ministry?

5 Ways Porn Will Hurt your Marriage

5 Ways Porn Will Hurt Your Marriage

If porn is involved in your marriage, you are not alone. Covenant Eyes reported in their most recent statistics (via MSNBC and a Stanford/Duquesne study): “In 2000, 25 million Americans spent 1 to 10 hours per week viewing Internet pornography, and as many as 4.7 million spent over 11 hours per week viewing Internet pornography.” Of those millions, I cannot imagine how many are married.

Here are 5 ways that pornography can hurt your marriage. I pray you take them to heart and know that none of us are immune to the affects.

#1: Porn Invites Comparison

#2: Porn Encourages Lies

#3: Porn Lowers Self-Worth

#4: Porn Robs Us of Intimacy

#5: Porn is Adultery

Perhaps the one of the most piercing passages of scriptures that cuts to the heart of the matter is Matthew 5:27-28; “You have heard it said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” The emphasis is not just on sight alone. To capture the real emphasis of the text and language we would conclude it is the continual looking lustfully at the opposite sex with the intent of engaging in mental sex!

To underscore the seriousness of the issue consider Christ’s more shocking statement in v.29; “If your eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell.” If this passage of scripture was practically applied to the Covenant Eyes report mentioned then millions would be blind. The subtlety of Christ’s instruction is for all us to get real and get active in protecting our eye-gate and ultimately protecting our marriages and family.